Grace

Well yesterday, August 28th was my big boy's first day of Kindergarten.  It was so hard for me to say goodbye to him.  It was hard because I couldn't believe he was already old enough to go to school but also because I hated the thought of him being away from me for 7 hours every day.  He enjoyed his first day and was excited to come home and tell me all about it.

Unfortunately, my day didn't get any easier.  After dropping Parker off at school, Eli and I went to the doctor.  It was time for my 15 week checkup (yes you read that right) and I was hoping to schedule a sonogram for the next week to try and determine the sex of he baby before Stephen deploys.  The doctor got out the Doppler to let us hear the heartbeat but she couldn't find it.  I was trying to be strong and optimistic since I had Eli with me but I knew at 15 weeks this was not a good thing.  We went into the sonogram room and saw our baby with no heartbeat.  They estimate that it passed away a week ago.  I had seen a specialist and was on a myriad of meds to keep me pregnant.  We all hoped it had worked and I had gotten off the meds at 12 weeks because the doctor said everything should be fine.  I am having surgery tomorrow and they will try to do genetic testing on the baby to see what is happening to cause this.

We have been surrounded by love and concern.  Our neighbors and friends are bringing food and taking good care of us.  I am a little concerned about Stephen deploying next week but am going to rely on God's grace and faithfulness to see us through.

Thank you for your prayers and words of encouragement.