That which does not kill us....

So I turned the big 3-0 just over a month ago.  I usually become very sentimental and nostalgic on my birthday partly because it is another year gone but partly because it is also very close to Christmas.  Well, this year, I was afraid of what I would feel on my birthday.  Here I was 30 years old, and while I have accomplished a lot of what I wanted out of life; marriage, family, travel etc....I had one thing looming over my head.  I always thought that by 30 unless I was pregnant I would be FIT.  Guess what?  That didn't exactly happen.  So as this birthday approached I kept hoping that I could put the brakes on time and somehow make the days last a little longer.  If you are a mother of toddlers, you know that to wish for LONGER days is pretty serious.  Well, my birthday came, and went.  I had a great time celebrating in my Mississippi home with lots of friends and family and I felt.....nothing.  NOT A SINGLE THING!  I didn't feel sad or nostalgic or anything really.  I was happy to be in the moment with my friends and family and moved right past that day as if nothing big had really happened.  Part of this was because our life was pretty crazy at the time with a deployed spouse, being away from home for a month, and an ailing grandmother.  I think a lot of my feelings just didn't surface because I didn't have time to think of myself.  This was a good thing.

Now it is almost the end of January and somewhere around 2 weeks ago I GOT IT!! No, not the self loathing or sad feelings of times gone by but the DETERMINATION!  I am now DETERMINED to get healthy and fit.  My 30th birthday brought me a discipline that I have never before had.  My dear sweet mother tried to forcefully teach me to be disciplined  for 23 years.  TWENTY-THREE years that woman tried and tried and tried to teach me to be more disciplined.  It just never caught on.  I am NO good with sticking with things.  I have a very short attention span and if it isn't "fun" frankly, I lack motivation to follow through.  Well, dear mother, please know that all of your hard work has finally clicked somewhere in my brain.  I am literally MEASURING everything that goes in my body.  Can you believe this?  Crazy!  I also go to the gym or do some sort of workout at least 4-5 times a week, with a goal of 6 times a week but I haven't gotten that far yet.

 I have seen why all of those "fat people" shows say that "you need to take time for yourself to be a better mom".  I have always thought that was hogwash, I've heard myself say those things to people and think in the back of my head, "yea whatever".  However, I have now realized with my new adventures in exercising that it does take time away from your family or just time that you normally would have to run errands, clean your house, or take a shower UNINTERRUPTED! If I work out from home I do it at naptime or if I go to the gym in the morning I have to take my kids to the grocery store after I pick them up from pre-school. If I want to do a work-out class at the gym, I have to plan ahead, have dinner ready and then head out where I'm gone for over an hour.  This happens usually around dinner time.  So yes, this is a sacrifice for me and for my dear, sweet, husband who is so encouraging.  I said that to say that it is TRUE!  You DO have to take time for yourself to be a better mom.  I have so much more energy for my kids now.  I play with them more, build tents for them and my irritation is further from the surface than normal.  Also, I've realized that my kids honestly don't think it's a big deal for me to be away from them for an extra hour and a half a day.  They really couldn't care less. 

To all you moms out there....just DO IT!  Also, please keep me accountable as I tend to quit things easily, as mentioned earlier!

Deployments

As a military wife deployments are very much a part of my life.  Having said that I haven't had to experience one in almost 4 years now and the fact that one is looming around the corner has me a little bit nervous.  I heard myself once say to a group of women, "I don't mind deployments, I almost enjoy them" and as it often does, the conversation moved on before I could explain myself.  Obviously no woman in her right mind would "enjoy" being left behind by her best friend and partner in life.  I often say these weird statements because I hate being the naysayer.  I don't like negativity.  I want to think everything's always coming up roses so to speak.  What I meant by that crazy statement is simply this:

Deployments are a very large part of our lifestyle and I do not spend my days or weeks or months worrying about the next one that is coming up.  I don't look forward to them but, on the other hand, I've accepted them as normal life and deal with them accordingly.  What good would it do me or my family to stress and complain about something that has to be done? When I said "I almost enjoy them" the ALMOST is a huge factor in that statement.  When I have my big girl panties (Sorry mom, I know I shouldn't use "panties" in a blog that could be read by "mixed company" haha, had to throw that in there) on and my rose colored glasses are perched perfectly on my nose, I see the positive aspects of a deployment.  I know that some of you fellow military wives are probably thinking, WHAT?! IS SHE NUTS?!  but this is honestly how my mind works.  Let's look at the positive aspects of my husband going to a foreign country where people want to kill him, those are as follows: We write letters, the handwritten kind,  when he deploys and it reminds me of when we were dating and first got married.  We learned a lot about each other in those letters and there is something magical about waiting everyday for the mail lady to bring you a small envelope with the love of your life's handwriting on it.  Also, the few days before he comes home I am a ball of nerves and expectancy...I can NOT WAIT to see him...it is truly an amazing experience to see your husband step off of a plane after 4 months of seperation and the PRIDE that comes along with the fact that he is awesome at his job and does it with character and integrity, without complaint, and because he feels passionately about serving this great Nation.  Also, there is a plethora of wives, some who I call friends who have said goodbye to their loved ones for a lot longer than 4 months, I can not complain about 4 months without my husband when friends of mine are surviving everyday knowing that that special someone will not come home.  And while I do worry sometimes about those things I try not to, "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.  Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:34 and Matthew 10:28-31,  28 Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul. Rather, be afraid of the One who can destroy both soul and body in hell. 29 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care. 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.


I don't look forward to deployments and am nervous about the kids wanting their daddy and not understanding how awesome it is that he is the kind of guy that is willing to walk away from everything he holds dearest and do a job that not many want to do. I am nervous that I will cry in front them when he leaves, I DO NOT CRY IN PUBLIC!  It is ugly, I am no pretty crier, I can assure you.  The only place I can feel the least bit comfortable crying around strangers is in a dark movie theater.  Church services have caused me to spring a leak from the eyeballs a few times and I do not like it.  However, I look forward to the letters, the longing that often goes away in a day to day routine of marriage and have faith that God is in control of our lives and we will be ok, whatever the circumstances.

Andrew Carter

Dear baby Drew,


     You were just born yesterday.  I can't believe that I haven't gotten to see your beautiful face yet or hold you in my arms.  I live pretty far from you now, 21 hours away.  To you that is about 10 meals and 8 naps.  I wanted to write you this note to tell you how precious and special you are to me and all of us, the crazy people laughing and poking at you, they love you too!  You see, your mommy is one of my very best friends in the entire world.  She is also my sister and when I was as big as you are, she held me, just like your big sister Olivia holds you.  It is so hard for me to see pictures of you and watch videos of your perfect face and not get to hold you, just like your mommy held me, and my two boys when they were born.  


     I don't know if anybody has let you in on this secret but you were a great big surprise for all of us.  We knew that God must be creating a pretty special somebody and he wanted us to be surprised because God knows how awesome surprises are.  You are the best surprise anybody could ever receive.  We are all so happy to have you and in just 6 weeks I will tell you all of this again when I finally get to see you.  Don't forget though, that Bebbi loves you and even though I haven't officially met you, I miss you so much!


     Your cousins Parker and Elijah, and your Uncle Stephen send you lots of love and hugs too!

It's Fall Ya'll!

Oh, how I adore this time of year. In Wyoming it is no surprise that Fall comes a lot earlier than in Mississippi. I can't say that I hate it. We wake up to crisp 60 degree mornings and bright sunshine. I love every minute of it. I've already made one too many trips to hobby lobby looking at all the pumpkins and fall decorations. I made chili for dinner last night and threw in some veggies I got from the Farmer's Market yesterday, yep it is a good time of year!

I find myself dreaming of pumpkin pie and searching for apple orchards. I've even looked up fall festivals for our area. Needless to say, I'm excited! Pretty soon I will be dragging my kids to every pumpkin patch within a 60 mile radius! They love it but of course, it's all for me. The pictures you capture, the great outdoor fun without the sweat; what is not to like? This is one of those things that just get sweeter when you have children. I never sought out pumpkin patches and apple orchards when I was single. The kids have opened up a whole new world of wonder for me in the world of Fall festivities and I love every moment of it.

My family takes a vacation to the Smoky Mountains every year and it is the highlight of our lives at this point. We talk about it all year long, we dream about it, my mom sends us pictures of the house we are staying in; let's just say it is a big deal in our family and we look forward to it all summer. I have to say that this year, I feel like i'm cheating a little bit. We live very close to some pretty awesome mountains, although I still prefer the Smokies and the weather right now in Wyoming is very much like the weather we enjoy while on vacation! So, to all my Mississippi family and friends, eat your heart out! Just kidding! Come visit, is what I meant to say!

Until next time,

Debbi/Leigh

Westerners!

Well, we have been living in Wyoming for 6 weeks now. The time has literally flown by! It has been so awesome to see what our surrounding areas have to offer. We have had a blast! Parker is enrolled in preschool with Eli on the waiting list. They start next Monday. I am enrolled in college taking just two classes but hoping it will be fun! Our life has officially begun in the west.

We haven't totally conformed to the western way of life. The boys did get some cowboy hats (the real kind not the walmart kind that they've had in the past). We have ridden some horses so I guess we are well on our way to becoming cowboys/cowgirl! HA!

It is absolutely beautiful here with nice weather and beautiful scenery. There are tiny little bunnies and antelope in my yard almost daily and kiddos from next door also who play with my kiddos allowing for dinner to get done in record time!
There are places that look like this only a short drive away:

We can't complain, well until winter!

Moving Day!

Well the day has finally arrived. The packers are here as I type. They will be moving our stuff on Monday but my dear friend is coming to oversee that part of the move and we will be heading west in the morning!

We have had LOTS of set backs and hard times over the last few months and STILL haven't rented or sold our house nor do we have a place to live in Wyoming. We are heading off in the faith that God is in control and He will take care of our every need. I am excited, scared, nervous, anxious, and overwhelmed right now.

I have to tell my family goodbye tonight and I am NOT looking forward to that even though I know I will see them in 3 short months. My mom and nephew are making the long trek out with us and I am so excited about our adventures with them but this Daddy's girl is NOT looking forward to telling her Daddy goodbye. Also, my sweet niece and nephews (the ones who are staying behind) are going to change so rapidly and I miss getting to be a part of all of their milestones. My boys' best friends are their cousins so this is going to be a huge adjustment for all of us.

I am very excited about what God has planned for our little family though and thank you all so much for all the prayers and support. I can't wait to update you on what it is like in the Wild West and educate all my southern friends and family on life in the arctic! :-)

My Baby is 3!

Well it happened a few weeks ago but we are busy getting ready to move and trying to offload this house to anyone who is willing to buy/rent/lease basically just pay the mortgage! But yes, in the middle of the chaos, Elijah turned 3 years old. I cry just thinking that my baby is 3 years old. He is such a joy and always adds entertainment to anything he is a part of. He lights up my life and fills my heart every single day with pride and laughter.

Elijah in pictures


All of that dark hair! I just couldn't believe it!

Then 1 year later, he's as blonde as can be!

His second birthday begins his love of Cowboy stuff.

And blossoms into ANYTHING pretend including "SCUBA GEAR"

Now he is 3 and Iron Man, goodness they grow up too fast.